Monday, August 29, 2016

Grimm Reviews – “The Rabbit’s Bride”




“The Rabbit’s Bride”

A woman and her daughter had a cabbage garden, and a rabbit came and started eating the cabbage. The daughter went to shoo it away, and the rabbit asked the girl to sit on his tail and go to his hutch. The girl refused.

The next day, the same thing happened and again the girl refused. But on the third day, she accepted and sat on his tail as he took her to his hutch. He set her to work as he went to invite the wedding guests.

So all the creatures showed up, but the girl was sad. The rabbit went twice to get her ready for the wedding, but the girl didn’t go. Then she stuffed her clothes with straw and went home to her mother. The rabbit came in the third time, and hit her and her “head” fell off and he was very sad for he thought he had killed his bride.

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They only grew cabbages? Why? Why not add some rabbit to their diet?

What did this girl think she was getting into, and why did it take the rabbit asking three times for it to work?

If it was so easy for the girl to just walk away, why did she wait so long to do it?

Um, okay. Was there a point to this story? Other than that talking rabbits are apparently somewhat stupid.

Monday, August 22, 2016

Grimm Reviews – “The Straw, the Coal, and the Bean”




“The Straw, the Coal, and the Bean”

A poor woman went to cook a bunch of beans. To help the fire, she threw a handful of straw in. As the beans in the pot bubbled, one fell out and landed near a straw. Then a coal fell near them.

The three began to talk and told of how they had escaped death and come to that place. They decided to leave the poor woman and see the world.

As they traveled, they soon came to a stream with no way to cross. So the straw said he’d lie across the stream so they could go across. The straw laid down, and the coal started across. When the coal was halfway across, she became terrified of the water. The straw burned in two, and the two fell into the stream and died.

The bean thought that was so funny she laughed until she burst. A tailor sewed her back together, and she thanked him, but because he used black thread beans now have a black seam.

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The riveting tale of an old woman cooking beans.

Who knew beans could talk. :D

I can understand parents getting tired of their kids asking questions about everything, so they start making up stories about why the sky is blue and whatnot. But this seems a rather elaborate explanation as to why some beans have a black seam.

Monday, August 15, 2016

Grimm Reviews – “Old Rinkrank”




“Old Rinkrank”

There once was a king who made a glass mountain. Anyone who could cross the mountain without falling would have the princess as a bride. A man and the princess were in love, so he set out to cross the glass mountain, and the princess went with him to catch him if he should fall.

Well, the princess slipped and the mountain opened up and swallowed her. It closed again, and the man and the king tried to break open the mountain but they couldn’t find the princess.

The princess fell into a cave below the mountain and met an old man with a long beard. He said that if she served him, she would live, otherwise he would kill her. So she did all he told her to do.

The man would take a ladder out of his pocket to climb out of the cave. Once out, he would pull the ladder up after him. When he returned, he always had gold and silver.

They lived that way for several years. He called her Mother Mansrot, and she called him Old Rinkrank.

So one day he was out and she locked all the doors and windows, except one small window. He called for her to let him in, but she said “No.”

He went around and saw the small window was open. He tried to look in, but couldn’t get his head all the way in. So he first put his beard in through the window, and the princess came and shut the window, catching his beard.

He begged her to let him go, but she wouldn’t until he gave her the ladder. She set the ladder up, and tied a string to the window. Once she was at the top of the ladder, she pulled the string and opened the window.

The princess ran to her father who was overjoyed. The dug up the mountain, put Old Rinkrank to death, and took all his gold and silver. And she and her betrothed were married.

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I guess I can see setting up an obstacle course for people wanting to marry your daughter, but a glass mountain?

Is that a ladder in your pocket ….

Wait, there’s a cave with windows? Huh? I guess there must have been a house in the cave.

Why did the princess wait years to pull this stunt? And why couldn’t her father find this cave? Why build a glass mountain over a cave? Why am I still arguing over this story?